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    今日

    情绪确实是低落到了极点。
       也猛然让我想起,精神上我是不是一直都沉浸在自己的幻想的世界中?时过境迁,今天再看昨天发的信息,没有了当时那种心境,也体会不出当时那种感情,自己尚且如此,何故他人?只是觉得自己有点可笑,然后对不起父母。
       我要深刻地剖析自己。
       一直自诩热爱中国经典,现在看来,多半也是附庸风雅,不求甚解,反而让人觉得迂腐和可笑。而我的骨子里,我觉得自己是个懦弱的人,平时标榜什么苦都不怕,其实心里面还是向往荣华富贵的;表面上说自己愿意为了爱赴汤蹈火,其实做了一点点事情,就渴望对方的响应,否则,就觉得自己好像吃了很多亏;总是希望对方能够和自己同甘共苦,可自己是否又能做到不离不弃?
       整个一日,这种羞愧感都像一条毒蛇一样撕咬着我,让我觉得自己愈加得可耻。
     
     
     

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    确实,自己常要解剖自己,会很痛,但很必要。 严于律己,宽以待人。
    Aug. 29

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